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The Guy Who Thrashed His PS Vita

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A gaming platform is no easy purchase; especially a PS Vita. There are pros and cons that are weighed. Costs are considered as well as games. It?s like a house or a dog or what to cook for your anniversary. An unconditional love stems from such a purchase. There is nothing more beautiful than a wallet giving birth to a PS Vita. This is why we swear like a sailor when we drop, destroy or?thrash?our PS Vita. We know how much we spent on it and we want to get our money?s worth of entertainment and satisfaction.

This is the reason why we do not understand this guy.

We are lucky not to see his face. For this is the face of evil. His video was inappropriately titled ?Hammer Drop test?. This video shows a scratched-up PS Vita being hammered and thrashed into the point of no return; as if being scratched up wasn?t bad enough already. There was no ?dropping? of any hammer. It was more like a wailing or a fraternity initiation.

There is a video of him scratching the screen. But we've been advised by our doctors not to watch it

There is a video of him scratching the screen. But we’ve been advised by our doctors not to watch it

From a gamer?s perspective, it Is very painful to watch something like this. We literally hugged our PS Vita after watching this video. We probably would have kissed it too if we were delusional enough.

What pissed us off even more was that the voice in the video invited viewers to ?have some fun? with the Vita. TheBitBag does not see the sense in having fun with a device that gives fun by incapacitating it to give fun completely. We believe it stems from a more sadistic upbringing which took precedence over the acquisition of a proper vocabulary.

OH THE HORROR. STAHP.

OH THE HORROR. STAHP.

However, from the thrashing of this PS Vita, we have come up with a few new discoveries about the PS Vita that we would otherwise not have known:

  1. It still works with a boatload of bad scratches on the screen.
  2. Those scratches must be painful to play with.
  3. We would never scratch up a Vita that badly.
  4. We should probably start investing in better screen protectors.
  5. We should probably start lobbying for gaming console rights.
  6. Only a complete troglodyte will spend that much money on something they will only destroy. We would like to ask him if there were other things in his house he didn?t want. We would gladly destroy them for him.

There are always lessons to be had at the end of every painful event. And in the immortal words of Batman?s butler, we would like to offer this piece of knowledge as a possible explanation behind this sort of behavior.

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