I was chatting with Matt about Fable 2 today. He really hates the game and expresses it in this Gamer Chat. Make sure you take a piss before reading this because I’m sure you’ll crack up.
Session Start (tordavis:ex_blade_mt): Thu Nov 13 10:35:14 2008
[10:35] ex_blade_mt: I’m gonna upload both the NBA 2K9 review as well as the Fable 2 review shortly
[10:38] tordavis: oh NICE
[10:38] tordavis: hey
[10:38] tordavis: did you see Thunderforce VI video review?
[10:38] ex_blade_mt: I just verified that 2K9 does NOT have a proper All-Star Weekend. there isn’t even one thing to do on the Saturday before the All-Star game itself!
[10:39] ex_blade_mt: there is NO reason why that can’t be in the game, especially since they have all the ingredients and have had time to refine them over the past few years since they frist brought them in
[10:39] tordavis: that’s a shame
[10:40] ex_blade_mt: it’s bullshit
[10:40] ex_blade_mt: Fable 2 still sucks, even after going out in the world away from that gay blacksmith job
[10:40] ex_blade_mt: Andrea can’t even believe it’s a real game and she doesn’t even play games
[10:40] ex_blade_mt: she sees how basic the combat is and how simplistic interactions are
[10:44] tordavis: I think it’s great
[10:44] tordavis: I’m totally into it
[10:44] tordavis: Your taste is more particular than mine though
[10:44] ex_blade_mt: how is it great??? please!!
[10:44] ex_blade_mt: mash X button, kill everyone. follow dog for treasure
[10:44] ex_blade_mt: do a gay dance and make women (and gay men) love you
[10:45] ex_blade_mt: buy a lame house, have lame kids, desert them, make a new wife, kill the town
[10:45] ex_blade_mt: who cares
[10:45] tordavis: I LOVE the combat, real estate and leveling systems. I love the fact that I can get married and have a kid.
[10:45] tordavis: I think the interaction needs an overhaul though
[10:45] tordavis: the elements are there, just not executed properly
[10:45] tordavis: but I still love the grind
[10:45] ex_blade_mt: having a kid doesn’t do shit tho! you can’t really do much. just make sure to keep the family in a nice house and visit them sometimes
[10:45] ex_blade_mt: gee that’s realistic
[10:46] ex_blade_mt: I should call into one of your shows and talk MAD shit about this game. you would be ROLLING. I can not properly express myself through written words
[10:46] tordavis: hahaha
[10:46] ex_blade_mt: I have to restrain myself as I write this. my blood pressure rises when I think of Fable 2 and even moreso when I have to play it
[10:46] tordavis: well, even if you don’t have skype, I could call your phone. that would be hilarious.
[10:47] ex_blade_mt: I wish to break things and do harm unto others when I think/play that game
[10:47] tordavis: hahaha
[10:48] ex_blade_mt: beyond that, it makes me upset that other people can find enjoyment with the game. it’s a sad cry for attention from Molyneaux
[10:48] ex_blade_mt: he must have gotten beat down every day as a kid
[10:48] tordavis: hahahahaha
[10:49] ex_blade_mt: why else would EVERY FUCKING GAME HE MAKES be about being a God or the one and only Hero in the whole world??
[10:50] ex_blade_mt: I walked past someone in the outside world who didn’t know me, so I did one (ONE) thumbs up at them. all the sudden, they loved me and started following me. WHAT THE FUCK!!!
[10:50] tordavis: hahahahahah
[10:51] tordavis: that is annoying as hell
[10:51] ex_blade_mt: I screamed in this little girl’s face so she was afraid of me, but then I did TWO of those dances in a row and her opinion went completely happy
[10:51] tordavis: ok let me post this as a gamer chat
[10:51] tordavis: people will fucking ROLL
[10:51] ex_blade_mt: I don’t care. it’s hard to write more than “This game sucks!” but I have
[10:52] tordavis: ok good. I’ll post it. people will love it. LOLOLOL
[10:52] tordavis: I’m fucking dying here
[10:52] ex_blade_mt: I hope Fable 2 is the last Fable game
[10:52] tordavis: I think so
[10:53] ex_blade_mt: I kept reading that Fable 2 was the game that Fable 1 wasn’t. how so? a few more interactions, a few more details, but not much else has changed. oh..the dog. yea, the dog
[10:53] tordavis: He’s doing Planet Maker next
[10:53] tordavis: No just kidding LOL
[10:53] ex_blade_mt: the dog that gets hung up on the world all the time
[10:53] ex_blade_mt: the dog that is hardly ever by the master’s side because it’s stuck trying to figure out how to walk around a jog in the path
[10:54] ex_blade_mt: I finally got the dog to return a ball I threw after about 20 throws!
[10:55] ex_blade_mt: did you know the dog can walk through fences? that’s impressive!
[10:56] tordavis: brb
[11:03] tordavis: ok
[11:03] ex_blade_mt: all my rants are understandable, right? there aren’t false
[11:03] ex_blade_mt: they’re
[11:03] tordavis: yes they are
[11:04] tordavis: that’s why I’m laughing. it’s because it’s true but I still can’t stop playing
[11:13] ex_blade_mt: are you playing male or female?
[11:14] tordavis: male and then femaie when I beat it
[11:14] tordavis: I’m gonna get knocked up and go into battle and see if they have miscarriages in the game
[11:15] ex_blade_mt: you are going to play thta much of the game? why???
[11:15] tordavis: cuz I enjoy it
[11:15] ex_blade_mt: go beat the Yellow Dam in a MUCH better game!
[11:15] tordavis: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
[11:15] tordavis: Not a lot of people will get that joke LOL
[11:15] tordavis: I still have the game. need to get my CDX to finish it
[11:16] ex_blade_mt: just get a Nomad and bring the shit to work when it’s slow
[11:16] tordavis: hhahah
[11:23] ex_blade_mt: I really wanted to like Fable 2, especially after seeing what they tried to do with part 1. I love the Morrowind/Oblivion type of games, but Fable just simplifies too much. you can’t even walk from town to town. it just tells you how long it will take then you are there
[11:26] ex_blade_mt: is that accurate? you can only explore in certain areas. the ‘in-between’ areas are all fast travel? you can’t actually walk when you see the 10 miles to such and such, 20 hours travel
[11:28] tordavis: treu
[11:28] tordavis: ture
[11:28] tordavis: true
[11:28] ex_blade_mt: that just shows they couldn’t come up with very much for the game. Oblivion lets you fast travel too, but you can also walk the whole way if you want
[11:30] tordavis: I can’t wait to see your review
[11:30] tordavis: I have to go
[11:30] tordavis: lots to do
[11:31] ex_blade_mt: this is the first review I’ve done where I’m having trouble arranging my thoughts. I keep adding side things that I need to add in
